Work Life Cats

My world is work life cats.

I’m not messing around.

I wake up between 6:30 and 7:00 AM because my poonchy cat, Emma, is hungry. That’s fine except we “free feed” our cats and she has dry food bowls all around the house. Doesn’t matter. Emma likes to eat “breakfast crunchies” from a particular dish when I wake up. Then she wants me to go into the basement and watch her as she eats round two of breakfast crunchies down there.

It’s cute. I don’t mind. What else am I doing with my life?

My other cat, Molly, is just like Emma except less poonchy. But she wants to eat the widely available crunchies in a special dish on the screened-in porch. Every. Single. Day. Breakfast is her favorite meal.

Roxy is no slouch when it comes to morning crunchies, either. She wants her special boo-boo-kitty-baby-crunchies that Molly can’t eat because Molly can’t digest grain. (Jesus.) Every morning, I give Roxy her babykins-crunchies in a fresh bowl on the counter while I make my goddamn coffee.

My cat, Jake, is old. He’s just grateful to be alive.

Sometimes I forget to put away Roxy’s kitty crunchies. When I’m downstairs with Emma doing round two of breakfast crunchies, Molly jumps on the counter and eats them. That’s fine except she pukes them up. Usually, it’s on someone else’s favorite toy. Like Roxy’s LGBTQ kitty rainbow.

So, yeah, you can talk to me all you want about your work-life balance issues. I have work-life-cats issues that begin when I wake up and go all day long. Don’t even get me started about first noshes, front benches and poo-poo parties.

I’m insane, but I’m also lucky. My work-life-cats issues are cuter than your work-life balance issues — minus the puke!