On this week’s episode of Punk Rock HR, it’s just me, and it’s a quick one, because I’m preparing for the launch of my paperback. That’s right! “Betting On You” is getting a second printing, this time in paperback, and so many people tell me that it’s an honor. It feels like something I need to go out and sell, so that’s what I’m doing to you today. The new paperback version will be available on Jan. 4, 2022. So, if you haven’t purchased a copy, you can go into any bookstore across America and get the hardcover or pre-order the paperback on your favorite book platform.
As I prepare for the paperback launch, I’ve been thinking about whether I sell 1,000 books or 10,000 books or one book. It doesn’t matter to me because my cats like me, my husband likes me. All of that is really good, and life is OK at home. The idea that I’m worthy without selling any books is not something that comes easy to me, but it’s something that I practice because I fundamentally believe that your work is not your worth.
I’ve been saying that for a long time, and I wanted to unpack that because it’s trendy these days to decouple work and worth. It’s time to practice this mindset actively.
Here’s how to put this into practice.
It’s Who You Are, Not What You Do
I’ve been fighting that battle for a long time. I’ve had boomers and millennials telling me, “Ruettimann, shut up and sit down. I am my work. I am so passionate about project management and logistics and creative design, blah, blah, blah. This is who I am. This is what I’m all about.” This made me feel sorry for those individuals, but I was in the minority regarding this mindset.
I’ve believed in this for ages, and now more people are starting to realize that. I recognize I’m on a podcast about work, I’m talking about my book, but if I were just to meet you at a random pizza joint, I would tell you about my cats and what I did this weekend and the vacations I’m planning, and what I’m passionate about in other areas besides my stupid book. So if your work is not your worth, you practice telling people who you are, not what you do.
Ask Others Who They Are Outside of Their Work
The second way this manifests in life is that when you ask about people, you ask them about who they are, and you follow up with questions about their passions, hobbies and interests, not their jobs. So again, if I were to meet you at a random pizza joint, I don’t really want to know about what you do for a living. I mean, OK, maybe, but I want to know who you love and how you spend your time and what you’re doing when you’re not working. That’s what’s most important to me.
Don’t Derive Your Worth from Difficulties at Work
When something terrible happens at work for me, it may be that I only sell three copies of my paperback; for others, it’s a delayed project, or you don’t get funding, or your boss is a jerk. We feel it in an emotionally regulated way. That means knowing our worth is not derived from this one moment in time. It’s just a job, and I know when I say that, you’re like, “It’s not just a job. It’s my everything.”
Well, go back to step one. You practice telling people who you are, not what you do. So if you’re a good person, if you’re in a partnership, if your parents love you, if you love other people, then this thing at work, it’s going to bug us, but we’ll put it in context — in an emotionally regulated way.
Pre-order the paperback of “Betting on You”
Resources
- Amplifying Black and Brown and Voices With Zach Nunn
- Ethical Leadership and the Society of Human Resource Management With Victorio Milian
- Being a Caregiver With Vadim Liberman
Full Transcript
Laurie Ruettimann:
Hey everybody, I’m Laurie Ruettimann. Welcome back to Punk Rock HR. This week, it’s just me and it’s a quick one, because I’m preparing for the launch of my paperback. That’s right, “Betting On You” is getting a second printing in paperback and they tell me it’s an honor. Feels like something I need to go out and sell, and so that’s what I’m doing to you today.
If you have not purchased your copy of “Betting On You,” and how could that be? I’ve seen the numbers. I think everybody I know has a copy. But if you like the book and you want to give it as a gift, it will be out on January 4, 2022. And if you haven’t purchased a copy, you can go into any bookstore across America and get the hardcover or pre-order the paperback on your favorite book platform.
Now I’m here today because as I get ready for this paperback launch, I’ve been thinking about how, whether I sell a thousand books or 10,000 books or one book, it doesn’t really matter because my cats like me, my husband likes me. All of that is really good. Life is OK at home.
The idea that I’m worthy without selling any books is not something that comes easy to me, but it’s something that I practice because I fundamentally believe that your work is not your worth. I’ve been saying that for a long time, and I wanted to unpack that today just really quickly, because it seems a little trendy these days to decouple work and worth, but I’ve been fighting that battle for a long time, and I had boomers, millennials telling me, “Ruettimann, shut up and sit down. I am my work. I am so passionate about project management and logistics and creative design, blah, blah, blah. This is who I am. This is what I’m all about.” I felt sorry for those individuals, but I was in the minority. I was truly holding onto this idea that your work is not your worth, for ages.
Finally, the time is here. So what does this mean? Well, you practice telling people who you are, not what you do. I recognize I’m on a podcast about work, I’m talking about my book, but if I were to just meet you at a random pizza joint, I would tell you about my cats and what I did this weekend and the vacations I’m planning and what I’m passionate about in other areas besides my stupid book. So if your work is not your worth, you practice telling people who you are, not what you do.
The second way that this manifests in life is that when you ask about people, you ask them about who they are and you follow up with questions about their passions and hobbies and interests, not their jobs. So again, if I were to meet you at a random pizza joint, I don’t really want to know about what you do for a living. I mean, OK, maybe, but I want to know who you love and how you spend your time and what you’re doing when you’re not working. That’s what’s most important to me.
Then finally, when something bad happens at work — for me, maybe I only sell three copies of my paperback — your project is delayed, or you don’t get funding, or your boss is a jerk. We feel it in an emotionally regulated way. That means knowing our worth is not derived from this one moment in time. It’s just a job.
And I know when I say that, you’re like, “It’s not just a job. It’s my everything.” Well, go back to step one. You practice telling people who you are, not what you do. So if you’re a good person, if you’re in a partnership, if you’re loved by your parents, if you love other people, this thing at work, it’s going to bug us, but we’ll put it in context — in an emotionally regulated way.
I’m really pleased to come to you every week and do a podcast about the world of work but sometimes I want to do a podcast called What Happened? where we go deep into your trauma and try to figure out why you are so upset about your job and not really upset about climate change or racism or sexism. You’re so worked up about work, but none of the other really important things in this world are bugging you. So that’s my dream for 2023, maybe. The podcast called What Happened?
But until then, you’ve just got Punk Rock HR and I really want you to remember that your work is not your worth and I also want you to remember that I’ve got a paperback coming out on January 4th, 2022.
Punk Rock HR is produced and edited through Rep Cap, with the help of Michael Thibodeaux and Devon McGrath. If you’d like to take a deep dive into the show notes, listen to previous episodes, there’s so many good ones. Zach Nunn talks about how your work is not your worth. I think about Victorio Milian, who did a great episode on the world of SHRM and also on himself and what he does when he is not upset at SHRM. There’s also a recent episode with Vadim Liberman, who goes on what it’s like to be a caregiver, which is his primary identity, even though he works at ERE. Well, those episodes can be found at punkrockhr.com.
Now that’s all for today and I hope you enjoyed it. We’ll see you next time on Punk Rock HR.
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