I’ve been studying up on different meditation and stress-reduction methods because, for some reason, this blog has led me down the path of being everybody’s big sister who is immediately ignored when she gives smart advice.
(Just like my real life! How great!)
Nobody knows how to make good decisions, especially at work where we are caffeinated, stressed, and exhausted from holding ourselves in awkward positions all day long. That’s right. You don’t let the chair do its job, and you keep your body in a rigid position and aggravate all kinds of muscles in your back, neck, and shoulders.
And nobody is breathing at work, by the way. Everybody has the potential to take one good breath and oxygenate the body. Very few are doing it. The brain and organs are running on empty, and the body is operating at a sub-par level. So when the shit hits the fan at the office, it’s no wonder that people explode — internally, externally — and make poor decisions.
Then they wind up on my blog after having googled I+hate+my+boss or I+hate+work and look to me for advice.
Should I quit my job? Why does my life suck so much? Can you help me write my resume?
If I had a nickel for every person who wrote to me about a broken professional relationship or a failing marriage, I’d have a Great-Gatsby-style swimming pool full of spare change and silver coins.
I’ve gone down the path of offering advice on my blog, but nobody takes it. I’ve tried to create a consulting model based on solving problems, but I’ve repeatedly learned that most individuals (including me) only want to address superficial challenges in their lives. Depression and anxiety are seductive and alluring states of mind.
Now I’m on to a software company to help codify and clarify a methodology to solve problems and beat failure. Does it work? Yes. Does anybody really want to solve their own problems? Not at this moment. Almost two-thirds of the professional workforce only shows up and collects a paycheck. Nobody is incentivized to solve problems and take ownership of their relationships and emotional wellbeing at the office.
That’s why I’m taking classes on stress-reduction and decision-making to bridge the gap between what people say they want and what they actually want to achieve in life. But I realize that I’ll continue to make poor decisions, and so will you.
Helping people make better decisions — and making better decisions in my own life — is the challenge of a lifetime. While I figure all of this out, I’m focused on breathing and self-regulating my emotions. I’m offering goodwill, kindness, and warmth to the people I love and the people who write to me in a state of panic and dismay. And I’m trying to offer kindness to those around me whom I find the most challenging.
Most of all, I’m offering my very best and most sincere good wishes to you. Especially my HR readers. Many of us are living lives that are incongruent with our values, including me. You can’t make smarter decisions and have a better quality of life unless you’re breathing. So I’m starting there. I hope you find your way there, too.