mushroom coffee

Got this note from a PR guy named Eric. In general, I’ve stopped picking on PR professionals. However, this one needs some work.

Dear Laurie,

Today I have some news for you that is incredibly inspiring and empowering and worth sharing with your reader audience.

Lean Cuisine just launched an initiative to challenge women to value themselves based on their accomplishments – not their physical appearance. With ridiculous means of evaluating the “perfect” body and precious moments taken away by painstakingly editing a photo before it goes live online, more and more women are evaluating their self-worth on superficial topics. We are better than this.

Nestlé’s Lean Cuisine is starting a social conversation about weight and value perception by asking women how they really weigh themselves in a new campaign called: Lean Cuisine #WeighThis. The campaign repositions Lean Cuisine as a modern health and lifestyle brand, by starting authentic, relevant social conversations among women.

We know you might be thinking this feels out of place for a brand like Lean Cuisine. Over the past several years though, the brand has been undergoing a transformation –focusing on creating the best products to fuel people doing amazing things every day. It is no longer the diet brand of the 80s. In fact, “diet” is one of the dirtiest four-letter words in our vocabulary.

As one of our established partners, we’d really like your help sharing our video and its messages with your followers. It can be as simple as posting the video on Facebook or Twitter, sharing Lean Cuisine’s Facebook or Twitter posts, or, if you feel so inclined, writing a blog post about what you want people to “weigh” you on.

If you have any questions about the campaign, or would like more information, I’m happy to help in any way I can.

Dear Eric,

God bless you, but your use of the majestic plural at the beginning of this letter is a little weird. I don’t assume sex or gender based on names, but that’s a lie because I do. Are you a dude named Eric who feels my unique pain as a woman who photoshops her pictures before putting them on Instagram? C’mon man. Have some pride. This note sucks.

Eric, you seem like a nice guy, but let’s get a few things straight. I wouldn’t feed Lean Cuisine to Khalid Sheikh Mohammed, let alone put that food in my mouth. Lean Cuisine tastes like overcooked baby food. Lean Cuisine tastes like a Sears leather sofa caught on fire. Lean Cuisine tastes like someone committed a hate crime against pasta.

After years of branding itself as nutritionally rich food but failing to make me skinny, Lean Cuisine tastes like shame. And if I’m going to feel shame and guilt from food, I’m going to shove something tastier in my pie hole.

Laurie Ruettimann


  1. “After years of branding itself as nutritionally rich food but failing to make me skinny, Lean Cuisine tastes like shame.”
    Lol! Spot on…

  2. Walk into any break room in America and you’ll smell it. The stench of failure. Over salted, over cooked, over used. I’ve lost 30 lbs in 5 months w clean eating and exercise. And occasionally pizza. I’m human.

    Food is fuel, folks.

  3. Tastes awful and is waaaay too expensive and packed with preservatives. I’ll admit I’ve gained weight since my passion for cooking took off like lightning, but what’s in my lunch bag? Fresh berries. Fresh veggies, A whole wheat wrap with chicken, black beans, corn, tomatoes and a lime jalapeno spread. Suck it, Lean Cuisine.

  4. Go Laurie.

    Not only is Lean Cuisine some gross stuff taste-wise, but it’s also made by Nestle, which I’m boycotting on principle since they want to charge us for access to water. Ugh.

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