“Don’t Die”

I’m off to Istanbul. People keep telling me, “Don’t die.” As if I’ll get caught up in the Syrian conflict or the ongoing fight against radical extremism. Or maybe they think I’ll get hit by a truck. Those things might happen, but what’s the alternative? Stay home and be a middle-aged white woman who fears…

Beds

My husband and I can’t seem to agree on beds. We moved to North Carolina in 2008. We had a queen-sized Stearns & Foster mattress that was slowly turning into a taco. Every night, I slept in a saggy pocket of sadness. We eventually had a conversation about the bed in 2010 or 2011. I…

Work Life Cats

My world is work life cats. I’m not messing around. I wake up between 6:30 and 7:00 AM because my poonchy cat, Emma, is hungry. That’s fine except we “free feed” our cats and she has dry food bowls all around the house. Doesn’t matter. Emma likes to eat “breakfast crunchies” from a particular dish…

Really great things to say at work.

Consulting is a tough business. Sometimes I feel weak, overwhelmed, stressed, upset, annoyed, or just plain exhausted. Sometimes I’m okay and notice that others are stressed. Here are some really great things to say at work on both sides of the aisle. I know you don’t have enough time. How can I help? You seem preoccupied.…

HR Bloggers and Analysts

Money has ruined the HR technology market, and it’s destroyed the HR bloggers and analysts. Especially me. I love seeing my friends earn a little cash, but everybody is so afraid of being left behind in the next great recession that very few people are willing to take risks and write boldly. I’m to blame.…

Stop Using This HR Buzzword: Iterative

There’s a word in our collective vocabulary that needs to die a quick death. The word is “iterative.” Have you heard it? Many IT professionals are thinking about iterative and incremental development cycles, which is a thing unto itself. But your HR director just learned the word “iterative” and is probably misusing it. For example,…

How to do a job you hate.

My adult life has been defined by doing one job: talking people off a ledge who hate their jobs. I don’t particularly enjoy my job of listening to other people complain about their jobs, but as America’s big sister, it is a constant in my life. Here’s how I manage a job that I hate…

Influencer Marketing

I want to pretend that I’m impressed by experts and influencer marketing campaigns. Unfortunately, that’s a lie. Experts are idiots. I’m an expert in some circles beyond my mind, and I don’t know anything. Nobody else knows anything, either. And let’s not forget that the robots are coming. We should all embrace a basic income and…

How to work with stupid people.

We all have them in our lives. Trump lovers, Bernie supporters, birthers, 9/11 truthers, and people who send you a voicemail/text/email and then stop by your desk two seconds later because they need a response. Here’s how to work with stupid people. Smile. Pause. Breathe. It diffuses the stupidity. Begin with praise. We’re all narcissists.…